Beyond Whole30: Day 1 (to infinity)

I had my colonoscopy today, and while the prep both sucked and blew, the procedure itself was easy-peasy. Propofol is awesome! (When administered by an ethical medical professional. RIP, Michael Jackson.)

I had to do another round of prep at 4:00 a.m. (beastly!) and report to the site at 8:00. I wasn't allowed to drink anything after 5:00 a.m. (seriously, beastly!), so I was itching to get it over with. I was hungry and thirsty, and I kept thinking about the reason I was there, which made me sad. But when the nurse anesthetist came to get me, the easy part started. I took a delicious nap, and I don't even need to think about what happened while I was blissfully resting. Next thing I knew, I was awake, and it was over. One of the nurses has a son at my school; I asked her to please not tell him she'd seen my butt. Anyway, all is well, and I don't have to do this again for ten years. Huzzah!

Whole30: Day 9

Breakfast
Nothing

Lunch
Nothing

Dinner
Nothing

I've had mostly water and some chicken broth today, with a little bit of apple juice to break up the monotony. I got my hair colored this morning and watched Falsettos with my best friend to keep my mind off the fact that I can't eat.

And yes, when I take the Suprep, I will be breaking Whole30, as it contains an artificial sweetener. Guess how much I care? I'm going to keep on keeping on.

Update: Oh god, Suprep is the foulest, vilest substance on the planet. It tastes like grape Dimetapp mixed with polluted ocean water.

Whole30: Day 8

Colonoscopy is in two days. Shit is getting real. (And yes, pun intended. You're welcome.)

All my food is pretty lame today due to colonoscopy prep.

Whole30: Day 7 and Week One Reflections

Breakfast
Omelet with sauteed grape tomatoes and fresh basil (This was okay, but not as good as the scrambled eggs with salsa. Definitely would have been better with some feta, but this is the life I have chosen.)

Whole30: Day 6

Breakfast
The last sweet potato bowl for a few days, as I'm having a colonoscopy on Thursday (whee! more on that later), and I'm supposed to avoid nuts and raw fruit and veg for the preceding three days. I figure that the almond butter and blueberries can wait.

I planned a few days worth of dinners and did the grocery shopping this morning. Here's the plan:

Sunday: leftover carnitas (I can't cook tonight because I'm going to a vigil in support of diversity and against xenophobia, anti-Semitism, racism, and hate. And because fuck the president and the actual, literal Nazis who support him.)

Whole30: Day 5

We all know what happened first thing this morning. No need to keep bringing it up. Unless you hear otherwise, you can just take for granted that I've had one cup of coffee with a little half and half and a little sugar.

Breakfast
Sweet potato bowl. Still good even with non-Maine blueberries. (The Maine blueberries are superior, though. I miss them.)

Whole30: Day 4

I began my day with coffee, lovingly dressed with half and half and sugar. (Not that much, calm tf down.) It was delicious and so very worth it.

Breakfast
You know. I will be having the sweet potato bowl until I get sick of it. Sadly, I used the last of my wild Maine blueberries this morning, so it's regular old NC blueberries from now on.

Whole30: Day 3

I tried another tea: Harney and Sons chocolate mint. It's okay. I really want my usual coffee back.

Breakfast

sweet potato bowl

I don't crave variety at breakfast, so I'll likely eat this every damn day. It's really good.

Lunch

Taco salad (romaine lettuce, grilled chicken, salsa, guacamole)

This was my first disappointing meal. It should have been good, but it wasn't. Fortunately, I finished lunch with a big bowl of watermelon. Watermelon season is the most wonderful time of the year.

I have a headache. Again. I really need my usual coffee back.

Whole30: Day 2

I miss my coffee already.

Breakfast

Sweet potato breakfast bowl. (See Day Zero for link.) This was really good. I would eat this if I weren't doing Whole30. I had baked several sweet potatoes a couple of days ago, so I removed the skin, put it in a bowl, and heated it in the microwave. I added some almond butter, coconut milk, and cinnamon, and mixed it up with an immersion blender. Then I drizzled it with a little coconut milk and added some blueberries that I brought home from Maine. It was delicious, and I'm looking forward to having it again. 

Whole30: Day 1

7:15

I'm enjoying one of my favorite parts of the day: the quiet hour (or so) when I'm awake before everyone else. I usually read (a book or the NYT app) or mess around on social media. And I have a cup of coffee with sugar and half and half. On weekends and during summer vacation, this is something I look forward to. During the school year, I look forward to my delicious coffee on the drive to work. I have never worried too much about the half and half and sugar, because I only have one cup. What's the harm? But it would be good, I suppose, to no longer begin my day with a hit of sugar, however small.

Whole30: Day Zero

Okay. I'm back from Maine, and though I frequently get hyped up about an idea but never follow through, I'm still starting Whole30 tomorrow. I decided to do it post-vacation because of all the delicious food I planned to eat while in Boston and Maine (clam chowder, lobster rolls, cannoli, blueberry pie, ice cream--it was a gustatory wonderland), but there was another reason that this ended up being a good time to start: when I'm going to be gone for a while, I like to clean out the fridge before I go, so I came home to a fairly blank canvas.

Whole30: Why the Hell Not?

I once read a comment (on Jezebel, I think) that said, "Why should I suffer because cavemen were too stupid to figure out carbs?" I wholeheartedly agreed. I ardently admire and love carbs. Yesterday I went to a Turkish place that had homemade pita bread, and it was like a religious experience. I. Love. Carbs.

And yet, I have impetuously decided to do Whole30. (The Whole30? I'm not sure.) I read an article and thought, hmm, maybe this is a thing I should do. It would be good to cut out dairy and sugar and to try to focus on eating fewer processed foods. So I did some further reading and saw all the things that you can't have: whole grains. (What? Those are good for you!) Legumes. (Are you kidding? They are very nutritious!) Gum. (Are you fucking joking?!) The verdict? 

But then I talked to someone who did it, and she was very convincing. I talked to my mom; restrictive eating is her jam, and her eyes lit up as soon as I mentioned it. Their positive responses were persuasive. There are really two reasons I want to do this, though: first of all, even though Whole30 doesn't claim to be a weight loss plan, I feel like I'm at a point where I have to do something drastic if I'm going to change my body. I don't hate the way I look; I am fit and healthy. But I'd like to go down a size or two, and this might be the way to do it. Mostly, though, I want to set a challenge for myself and then surmount it. I want to do a thing that I didn't think I was capable of doing. Last year I ran a half marathon, which I once thought I was incapable of. This year, I'm going to do Whole30. And I'm going to blog about it, as a way to keep track and to keep myself motivated. 

It would be nice to strike while the iron is hot and jump right in while I'm enthusiastic about it, but I'm going on vacation next week. I am going to have clam chowder and cannoli in Boston. I am going to have lobster rolls in Maine. (And dammit, I will probably have Funyuns in the car.) But once I get home, I'm giving myself one day to shop and plan, and then I'm doing this thing. I'll let you know how it goes. 

She Gets It From Her Mama

This is an important thing to know before you start reading this story: I am a rule follower.  Not a mindless one, but a rule follower nonetheless. If a rule is in place and it makes sense, I will follow it and give the side-eye to anyone who doesn't.  I like order.  Bear this in mind.

I run on an indoor track at my gym three days a week.  I've been running for almost a year, and while I have increased my distance considerably (and am preparing for a half marathon in less than two months, woot!), I am not fast, nor do I have any desire to be.  I go as fast as my short legs will allow me, and I am okay with that.

Well, it turns out that not everyone is as okay with my moderate, steady pace as I am.  Here's the setup at my gym's track: there are three lanes, and a sign requests that walkers use the inside lane and joggers use the outside lane.  Presumably, that leaves the middle free for passing.  Of course, everyone ignores that, and there are considerably more walkers than runners (I won't call myself a jogger, as I have no interest in finding dead bodies).  You tend to find walkers and a few runners in the middle lane.  I stick to the outside lane because I don't want to have to weave in and out of the walkers, and also because of my above-stated penchant for following the rules.

Christmas Jams, annotated

It's December, which means that I can finally listen to my Christmas music loud and proud (I'd been sneaking around since before Thanksgiving).  I'm about as secular as they come, but some of my favorite music is holiday-themed.  I've been working on this playlist for a couple of years now, and it's close to perfect.  I'm always looking to add to it, though, so if you know a great song that I don't, please share. Here are some of my favorites.

Doing it Myself

When we moved into our house eight years ago, it was very much an if-it-ain't-broke-don't-fix-it situation.  We replaced the hideous carpet, and of course, after years of rental whites and beiges, we painted the walls.  That was pretty much it, though.  Did I love (or even like) the weird kitchen wallpaper and the shabby oak (-looking) cabinets?  No, I didn't, but I could tolerate them, and that was enough.   And the less said about the dated parquet floor in the dining area, which was so scuffed that it looked like it regularly hosted tap-dance battles, the better.  Still, it was structurally sound, so I wasn't spending a dime on it. So there, HGTV-industrial complex!  It's not like I don't care about having beautiful surroundings, but when you're broke and not exactly handy, you just count a lovely home as one of those nice things you can't have right now.

The OG kitchen. Not a good look.

Several years later, something momentous happened: in December of 2013, I visited Ikea for the first time, and it was a quasi-religious experience.  All of a sudden, I wanted a beautiful house, and I wanted it immediately.  It all seemed within my reach, and I was determined to make it happen.

...And the livin' is easy.

Summer!  It's here!  Well, no, it isn't.  Reality says that it's still spring; I still have a full day of work left, and then I have training next week.  Still, I'm not getting up at five anymore. so that's something.  Though it feels so near yet so far, I will be enjoying my awesome summer vacation soon (though Pat McCrory and his merry band of assholes may try to take that, as it's the last remaining perk of a teaching career, and some of them mistakenly think that they pay us for it).  However shall I spend my time?

The Santa Question

Ohhhh boy. Break out the eggnog, because I have a Christmas-themed problem.  I am trying to raise my daughter to be empathetic and compassionate, and fortunately, that finally seems to be bearing some fruit. One way that I've tried to encourage her to think about and do for others is by participating in an annual toy drive at my school.  I take her to Target, and she picks out a nice toy to donate.  I have explained to her that some children aren't as fortunate as she is, and that their families don't have enough money to buy Christmas presents.  Since we can help, I tell her, we do.  It's a small gesture, but I hope it has an impact. Well, clearly it doesn't.

Value Added

Today, in the middle of a staff development session that I was leading, we got the email that we dreaded and feared: the EVAAS numbers were out.  What the hell does that mean, you may ask? It means that teachers across North Carolina got to see their "value-added summary"--the measure of how we affected our students over the course of the last school year.  Supposedly, what a teachers give to their students can be figured mathematically.  If you've ever had a good teacher--or a bad one, for that matter--you know ridiculous that is.

According to EVAAS, my students met expected growth.  This pretty much means that, on the whole, they did exactly what the mathematical formulas said that they would do.  I didn't actively harm them, but I didn't help them to do better than they were predicted to do, either.  Based on these results, I am an average, middle-of-the-road, mediocre teacher.  The results, of course, are based on test scores, which in my opinion are the least interesting thing about any of my students.  Fortunately, I don't take these things too seriously.  I care deeply about how I affect my students, but I just can't put that much stock in one test.

Travel Journal: July 19, 2013

Edinburgh to Skye

Lou and I are on our way to Skye!  Last night we ate dinner at the Phuket Pavilion--delicious--and walked around a bit.  I didn't want to venture too far from the hostel in case we got lost.  Wandering through a city--one of my favorite activities--is a little more fraught with a small child. Getting lost is no longer fun and carefree; it's a pain in the ass at best and dangerous at worst.

Travel Journal: July 18, 2013

Edinburgh

Charlotte and I just arrived in Edinburgh.  We had a great last couple of days in Sussex: swimming in the ocean, dinner at the Lobster Pot, shopping and a cream tea in Chichester. Anna cooked pasta for dinner last night, and then Charlotte and I went for a last walk along the prom.  The scene was beautiful but odd: the sea and the sky were the same pale, hazy blue.